You know as excited as I get about Tuesday (Mario) and Thursday (Grey’s Anatomy) you would think I didn’t have a life. But I do. A busy life. But I appreciate the little things. I really do.
So this week my mantra has been Just Be Me. Make this today the best it can be. No regrets about the past, no anxiety about the future. Just the incredible lightness of being in this moment. In this NOW (I know it's kind of long for a mantra but really I just repeat the Just Be Me part) . So that is what I have been trying to do. It’s harder than you would think. It’s amazing how much of what we do is based on what was or what will be. Kind of makes it easy to miss the little things. So this week I have been noticing all the little things. Like the gorgeous pink sunset on Tuesday evening, and the way daughter S has decided that she should talk out of the side of her mouth because it is just something new to try, and languishing in the pleasure of the millions of hugs and kisses that are unconditionally bestowed on me by daughter L. And watching L take over as the “boss” when S is not feeling well. Yesterday she was so lonely she thought she might have to cry. She didn’t but she thought she might have to. And having those rare moments of connecting with A when he isn’t a raging hormone teenager. The now really is good.
Personally I’m not sure a person can live every day in the now, it seems a little bit like sticking your head in the sand but every now and then it's a good thing. Maybe I'll start small - a now day every month and then try working it into every week. Of course it would make sense to do it on a non-crabby day and who knows maybe it will work so well I will have more non-crabby days and I will have to change my name to not so crabby girl. I could like her.