Monday, September 29, 2008

As if being Monday wasn't enough...

okay so I had my post all written - just checking my links to make sure they all worked - when poof it's all gone. But that's okay because you know what? Blogger auto saves. They auto draft save every two minutes so I'll just pop into my posts and pull up the draft - well except for some reason Blogger failed me and DID NOT autosave my draft. Grrr. So here I am trying again. I really shouldn't be surprised by the Blogger fail as it is one of those days. It's Monday. It's raining. I'm crabby. Seriously. I don't even know why I am crabby but I'm just waiting for someone to tick me off so I can come up with a reason to be mad. I KNOW! Don't think I don't because I do - I know how I am and it's not good. So that's been the day so far. Since I'm not exactly walking on sunshine I'll just take care of a couple of things that were asked of me in email.

1st - believe it or not there is someone who doesn't have the slightest clue what the Grey's Anatomy Bomb Episode Last Kiss thing is all about. So in my true spirit of wanting to educate the world about Grey's Anatomy and it's application to real life (because seriously, there is almost nothing that makes Amy and I happier than being able to apply an episode of Grey's Anatomy to real life) here is the script dialog found somewhere on the internet - the birthplace of all trivial information:

(Cut to Derek standing in front of the door waiting for Meredith. He sighs. Meredith comes up and stands right in front of him.)
MEREDITH (softly): Hey.
(He stares at her looking very relieved)
DR. SHEPARD: Hey. You almost died today.
MEREDITH: Yeah. I almost died today.
(He looks at her for a bit and then opens the front door to leave)
MEREDITH: I can't ... (he steps back into the house) I can't remember our last kiss. All I could think about was I'm going to die today and I can't remember our last kiss. Which is pathetic, but the last time we were together and happy I … want to be able to remember that. And I can't Derek. (he nods) I can't remember.
DR. SHEAPARD: I'm glad you didn't die today.
(He goes to leave out the door. Meredith turns around to back upstairs. He stops her when he speaks standing at the doorway)
DR. SHEPARD: It was a Thursday morning. You were wearing that ratty little Dartmouth t-shirt you look so good in. The one with the hole in the back of the neck. (he chuckles a little) You'd just washed your hair and you smelled like some kind of flower. I was running late for surgery. You said you were gonna see me later and you leaned to me, you put your hand on my chest and you kissed me. Soft. Was quick, kinda like a habit. You know, like we'd do it every day for the rest of our lives. You went back to reading the newspaper and I went to work. That was the last time we kissed.
(He moves to leave again almost closing the door when Meredith speaks)
MEREDITH: Lavender. (he steps back in) My hair smelled like lavender from my conditioner.
DR. SHEPARD (nods): (Lavender. (smiles) Huh.(He leaves and Meredith starts to head back up to her room)

So that was the dialog - riveting huh? But you have to admit I was right about that angst thing.

The other question that I have been asked is in light of the new iPod what exactly is hot on my playlist (which took up no less than 7.91 gig - seriously). Well right now these are getting a lot of play (and I wonder where Alex gets his tendency to listen to songs that he likes over and over and over again :-):

HELLO ITS ME - Todd Rundgren
MY MY MY - Rob Thomas
STORM - Lifehouse
SPACE BETWEEN - Dave Matthews

Holy Bananas, no wonder I am out of sorts I think I need to lighten up a bit on the playlist.


Oh and if anyone else has any pressing questions they are just dying to have answered bring it on :-)

Thursday, September 25, 2008

It's official...

fall has arrived and the new episodes of Grey's Anatomy have begun. I think I was a little disappointed tonight. Amy and I will have to discuss all the nuances and subtle plot undercurrents before I can make a final decision :-)

I'm just not sure what they will possibly do now that Meredith and Derek are going to try to live happily ever after - defying all the odds. Actually I am in the middle of rewatching Season 2 on DVD. Season 2 where there was much angst between Derek and Meredith as he tried to make his marriage to Addie work. And guess what? You may find this hard to believe but I was actually hoping that Derek and Addie WOULD work it out. That he would decide he loved her more than he loved Meredith. That he would forgive Addie and THEY would live happily ever after. I bet you never would have guessed that is the ending I was hoping for considering my romantic nature but really I liked Addie. She was strong and powerful and smart and beautiful and NOT whiny - where as Meredith WHINY. WHINY WHINY WHINY. "Pick Me. Choose Me. Love Me". Remember that? Pathetic - the girl was pathetic and besides what did it get her? He didn't pick her, choose her, love her - he picked his wife. Sure it was temporary but at least the guy tried - and he had my support - he must not have known that part :-)

Anyway, compared to Season 2 tonight's episode seemed to be a little lacking. Maybe I'm biased though since I just watched the Bomb Episode with adorable Kyle Chandler and the scene at the end when Derek comes to Meredith's house to make sure she is okay and she tells him all she could think about was that she couldn't remember their last kiss because she didn't know it was going to be the last kiss. But Derek - he remembered - and told her - but still didn't kiss her - just turned and sadly walked away (0kay, so maybe I got a little romantic about that scene and wasn't hoping for Addie any longer - it was my turning point :-)). But still - ANGST. So much ANGST. What are they going to do without all that angst???

I know I know - rambling when I should really be getting ready for my crazy busy weekend. Seriously I am only working a half day tomorrow then I'm going to help in the school lunchroom at noon then I'll come home and prepare for the party, go back to school to pick the girls up and take them to dance and then leave them in my parent's care, blah blah blah. And Saturday isn't much better, birthday parties, taking up the gifts at Church and a fund raiser in the evening. I'm going to need a nap on Sunday :-)

Have a fabulous Friday.and if you are in my neighborhood feel free to stop in. There will be plenty of food and drink and you know what they say - the more the merrier!


Wednesday, September 24, 2008

It was a good day...

a very good day. No, there was nothing special that happened. No, I didn't get a stay out of work for free card. No, I didn't win the lottery. But none-the-less, today, it was good.

  • There was NO whining!
  • The weather was fabulous and the sky was the most incredible shade of blue (I know I am a self-proclaimed pink girl but really I love blue too - there are so many different hues and shades - I'm especially partial to the deep ocean blues).
  • I spent most of the day out of the office. It was work stuff but I got to be outdoors quite a bit with one of my very favorite co-workers. I enjoy his company and he appreciates my quirky sense of humor so it was a good afternoon with much laughter.
  • And I heard a great story about my daughter Syd. Although the whining can send me over the edge I love being a mother and I strive to provide much positive nurturing and a strong sense self-worth in my kids (that does not mean that they don't get reprimanded but there is a l0t 0f positive praise in our household. I think we have a happy medium). BUT I may have to do a little bit of talking about humility with Syd. It seems that the Kindergarten teacher was showing each child's school picture to the class while she was handing out their photo packages. She would ask the class who the child was while holding up the picture to help them learn each other's names, etc. Well when she held up Syd's picture Syd stood up and said "Isn't it beautiful". I guess I don't have to worry about her self-esteem. Oh and I heard the other kids earnestly agreed :-) It makes me laugh.

So that's it. Simple little things that made today a better day than the day before.

Oh, and lest you think it is all about me all the time, I bought a little gift for the HotY today. I can't tell you what it was but it made him happier than an iPod and a good movie combined. He's feeling pretty lucky right now and that also makes me very happy! So there, see, it isn't always just about me - seriously!

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Remember that thought...

about quiet reflection - well let's just say the moment is over. I'm glad I didn't make any promises to myself about that kind of thing for more than one day. HOLY BANANAS.

My children have been WHINING incessently since we walked in the door. I can deal with crabby. I can deal with sassy. I can deal with sad and mad and glad. BUT whining drives me insane. I can't listen to it. It makes me want to run out of the house and never come back. I don't even know where they learned this from because I may be a lot of things but I AM NOT A WHINER and I don't think there is anyone who can dispute that fact. I'm sorry I'm complaining and really what kind of real mom would say these things - but the whining - it has to stop. Besides I'm not going to leave - at least not until the HotY gets home.

My iPod Nano came today and right now I can't even find happiness in it's wonderful Hot Pinkness. Why? Because there is WHINING happening in my house and not only that but I accidentally set the language to Greek or some darn language that I don't have a clue how to understand (I could have navigated myself around if I had selected Spanish). So now I have to reset the language - but is there a manual included? NO, they refer me to their web-site - which is where I went and why I am here right now because I can't concentrate on a manual when there is WHINING going on so instead I'm here - complaining to you!

There was something else I was going to write but I've forgotten and why have I forgotten? Because of the WHINING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, I'm going to take some deep breaths now. I'm going to pretend I don't hear Lauren sitting on the stairs whining because she's hungry even though she has already had a cup full of colored marshmallows. I'm going to pretend she is not getting louder. I am going to pretend that I am far far away. Damn this is not working - I still hear her but the good news is I remember what else I was going to say - it's big stuff. Really! (oh but before we go one more step further let me just say that the HotY - HE'S LATE!!!! He obviously has super special ESP also and knows about the whining that is going on here. Lucky him).

ANYWAY, in the past two weeks four people have been in shock that I do not have a Facebook Page. At first I thought this might be hard for them to believe based on my social personality but then I was informed that it is surprising because of my overriding need to know stuff - in otherwords there are people who think I may be NOSY! I know! In order to appease all those shocked with disbelief by my lack of a Facebook Page I now have a Facebook Page. I don't have anything on it and I feel far too old to have a Facebook Page and I only have a few friends right now but I'm finding out more and more good stuff all the time :-)

Ahhhhh... the HotY just got home - and would you believe the whining has stopped - of course - AND he brought me a present - the Sex and the City movie - who knows when I will be able to watch it - but at least it's mine. OH AND BY THE WAY if ONE person leaves a comment telling me I am spoiled or a princess or high maintenance I'm going to delete it - seriously.

Okay I'm off to feed my family and figure out this iPod thing so I can take a walk by MYSELF and try to forget about the whining.


Monday, September 22, 2008

It's that day again...

Monday. Monday. Monday. I just keep thinking it to myself. Monday. Another day. Another dollar.

The girls used to have gymnastics on Monday so it has been ingrained in the schedule in my head that we have something to do on Monday nights but alas gymnastics ended at the end of August. My brain still thinks I have something to take care of on Monday nights. A look at the calendar proves my brain is wrong. Sometimes that brain wrong thing happens - it can't all be logic.

In honor of Monday and all it brings I wasn't going to write today. I feel like I've been pretty chatty lately - thinking the world really wants to know about my trips to the gas station, my home town visits, the progress of my bathroom remodel/redo and my general state of mind. HA! I'm really not as all "IT" as it may sound - I just tend to get chatty at times. And today is the Autumnal Equinox which equals quiet reflection to me. So today - I'm not doing it. I'm not chatting. I'm just going to spend my time thinking. Thinking, chatting, writing, are all introspective - but the thinking - it's so much less irritating so for you - today - it is non-irritating Monday. You should take adavntage of the quiet now because I can't make any promises about tomorrow :-)

So GO - take some time to notice the changes in the air- the crackle of leaves under your feet, the slightly musty pungent smell of mums and falling leaves, the soft blue of the sky that only happens in this peculiar hazy autumn light. Reflect and just be. Just be for this one day...

Saturday, September 20, 2008

The slumber party that wasn't...

I'm home - it's Saturday night (well ALMOST Sunday morning) and I'm home from the St. Joseph's Grade School Reunion Class of 19__. The original plan was to stay overnight at Roxann's mom & dad's house - but the party ended sooner than she thought it would and my vote was to just drive back home. So that is what we did.

The reunion was a blast. 12 of us showed. There was Bridget who looks exactly the same today as the day we graduated from 8th grade. Genie who is an Iowa State Trooper Sargent (is that the correct terminology). She let us know women should NEVER cry if they get pulled over by a male cop - well by a State Trooper anyway. Rhonda who was the instigator of the entire party and who did a GREAT job. Luann who is still as sweet as ever. And of course there was Rox who was Rox. There is just no way to describe her - to know her is to love her.

Then there were the boys; Joe, Steve F., Steve L., and Mike. All who have grown up to be very nice men. And of course Bryan and Tom. Bryan who actually wore a pea green leisure suit with a polyester dress shirt and WHITE shoes to the party. Bryan who couldn't wait to play and tell me THIS SONG always reminds him of me. I thought for sure it was going to be THIS SONG just because I remember we both had the 45. I think the Chicago song was the first record I ever bought.

And then there was my cousin Tom. Tom and I who have known each other since we were in diapers. Tom and I and our siblings and a shared babysitter who were all forced by our mothers' to dress up as Snow White and the Seven Drawfs for Halloween when we were but babes. Tom who was one of my best friends. Who held my hand from Kindergarten through 8th grade when he moved away. Although we are related because his mom and my dad are first cousins (their dads = brothers) we really grew up together because our mom's were best friends in high school and beyond. There were many days each week when we spent entire mornings into afternoons together because our mom's would be having coffee while we ran wild. In total there were seven kids and two frazzled mom's - no wonder they needed a coffee break. Those were good times. Really good times. Anyway, I really enjoyed seeing Tom and reminiscing and remembering. Man we had fun. I was so sad when it was time to go I actually teared up (it's that good-bye thing - not good at the good-bye thing). Good friends. True friends. Those friends that have known you since you were in diapers. How many of those come back into your life? I feel pretty lucky. So now Tom and I have exchanged email addresses and cell phone numbers. There is no excuse not to keep in better touch. Actually I wish I had thought to add everyone to my phone.

After the reunion broke up Rox and I took a little tour around the town. We went past my old house (my parents have since moved to another town) and Beth's old house and Malia's old house and the swimming pool and the high school. It was fun to revisit all of those places. Shared memories. It was a good thing. A very good thing.

And now I'm tired. It was a long day. Oh and of course I wasn't ready on time. I tried I really tried but there were circumstances beyond my control. I called Roxann at 9:10 and said - "ummm I haven't even gotten into the shower yet" (she was coming to pick me up at 9:30) "I'll call you as soon as I'm out". Well of course I didn't call her as soon as I got out - I had make-up and hair to do. As soon as I heard the radio announcer say it is almost 10:00 and I really had barely started to get ready for the day I knew it wasn't going to be good. I had no sooner finished this thought when the phone rang - Rox. I answered by saying "no, I'm not ready, just go without me and I'll meet you there". Of course she wouldn't accept that answer and said she would go to the grocery store and then come and get me. I really did make good time after that and only ran around like a chicken with my head cut-off for a few minutes after she arrived. We were an hour late in getting on the road - plenty of time :-)

Okay, I'm done now. I think I'm running out of steam.


Technically it is Saturday...

you would think after the last post I would be anxious to put the day behind me but it is now 12:40 a.m. and I am still awake. I am waiting for the last load of laundry to finish and then I will probably call it a night. This is another one of the HotY's pet peeves - my staying up LATE on the weekends. On the weekends he will usually head to bed about 11:30. On his way up the stairs he'll stop in my room (my craft, office, mess room) and ask me how much longer I will be. I'll inevitably say, I'll be up in about a half an hour I just need to finish up, blah blah blah. You get the picture. But then I'll get involved with something on the computer or I'll start watching Conan O'Brien (who I think is very funny in a very quirky kind of way) and before I know it, it is 2:00 a.m. I really don't intend to stay up this late but it's quiet and peaceful and no one is begging to use my computer (I hate to say it but we have two computers - we really need another - I'm lobbying for a laptop). Anyway, this is my time. And really, by the time I get a second wind around 9:00 p.m. I'm good for another five hours. I'm a night owl. Regardless Mr. HotY usually isn't too happy with me by the time I climb into bed at 2:00 in the morning. He will groggily ask what time it is while I am crawling in and he is turning off the light. When I say 2:00 a.m. he just gives me a big sigh. OOPS! But really it's the weekend and I'm a big girl, I think I can pick my own bedtime. Besides after my absolutely, terrible, no good week I have a treat coming my way. LOOK - LOOK what I am getting (The first person who can correctly guess the correct color will get a free sign of my choosing). I'm getting the 16GB version because I would fill up the 8GB before you could blink. I can't wait. The HotY ordered it tonight and I should have it by the 24th. WOOHOO. I would start cleaning out my playlist in anticipation of a fresh start but I would be up until the VERY wee hours of the morning listening, sorting, deleting...
I think I just heard the dryer buzz which means I'm heading to bed. Roxann is picking me up at 9:30 a.m. and I better be ready because the girl is usually on time.

Friday, September 19, 2008

I'm not going to the gas station anymore...

Seriously! My stopping for gas experiences have been less than ideal lately. This morning I stopped on my way to work (and really 6:45 a.m. is not the time to stop for gas - every construction worker in the world is at Kwik Trip at 6:45 in the morning - I guess they are all looking for their first Big Gulp of the day). ANYWAY, first I don't know what I was thinking about but I had to swipe my card three times - why? Because I was doing it upside down. I'd look at the illustration, look at my card, and then insert the card the exact same way I had done it before which was upside down or backwards or whatever. I knew I had to make changes but my mind was just not processing the information. Then I kept missing the flipper thingy with the hose nozzle to start the gas (remember - I do as little touching of the whole gas thing as I can as I hate it when that smell gets on your skin). THEN I got in the van and realized I had absolutely no idea how much money I had just spent. So out of the van AGAIN to look at the amount. I'm sure anyone watching me was highly entertained. But WAIT it gets better. As I am now finally on the road and enjoying listening to this song - Our House on the radio (again, music before my time but I'm drawn to this genre, I'm not sure why)and am almost at work the oil light comes on and my van SHUTS DOWN! I mean no power. Luckily I had momentum going and really was just about at work so I made it into the parking lot and haphazardly parked taking up two spaces. Well that in itself was distressing because good parking is at a premium where I work and I didn't want anyone keying my car. I didn't know what to do. I called the HotY in tears and told him about the van. He told me he would take care of it and to just pull myself together and go to work. It would get taken care of. So that's what I did - AFTER I wrote a little note that said "Sorry - Car Died" and put it on my back window in hopes of avoiding a parking lot rage incident! Is it Friday yet? Oh wait it is Friday and I'm not really feeling the weekend love.

At the risk of being dramatic and very not entertaining IT HAS BEEN A HARD WEEK. There I said it. It has been a fricking hard week and I'm darn glad it is almost over. It's been one of those weeks where I have been so preoccupied with life stuff that I have totally lost track of the days and the time. It just dawned on me this morning - hey I have things I have to get done tonight. I'm going to be gone for the weekend. I have clothes to wash and things to get ready. I don't even know if I have told my kids I'm going to be gone yet. I mean I know I've talked about the whole "class reunion" thing and all but the information just has not been registering - just like I had totally forgotten that I planned a party - at my house - for next Friday. There will be 15-20 people at my house next Friday and not only have I not done ONE THING in preparation I haven't even started to THINK about preparing. UGH! So if you are coming to our house on Friday night and all we have to serve you is bread and water don't say you haven't been warned.

So in conclusion - It's been a bad week. I'm glad the week is almost over. I am hoping that next week will be a better week and I hope no one else is having a week like this - but if you are - I'm sorry. Please know I'd hold your hand if I could...


Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Lies and deceit...

Okay well maybe that is a little strong but I HAVE been led astray - okay fine that still isn't right. How 'bout information has been withheld - that's it - INFORMATION HAS BEEN WITHHELD from me by "people" I know. Last night I found out that my dear friend Roxann, my dear computer illeterate friend Roxann, the same Roxann without her own darn email account, has been WITHHOLDING information from ME! Not only is she not computer illeterate and actually knows quite a bit about computers (she actually threw the term "wireless router" into our conversation last night)BUT she has been reading my blog FOR A LONG TIME. Did she ever mention that fact? Did she ever indicate that she has been reading this blog? Did she ever express knowledge about any of my blogged people of subjects? NOOOOOO she did not because, let me say it again, she was WITHHOLDING INFORMATION. And I HATE withheld information. There is nothing too trivial for me to add to my information knowledge bank - trust me!

Anyway, she came clean last night but she knows in the future there will be NO MORE INFORMATION WITHHOLDING. Oh and this blog will come as no surprise to her - I already told her - expect to read about it because THIS - THIS non-disclosure of information - it's a big thing. It will be discussed :-)

So it hasn't been the best day ever :-) Okay fine in the scheme of things the information withholding isn't that big of a deal - but just go with me here - there are things and it just hasn't been the best day...

Monday, September 15, 2008

What was I thinking,,,

when I decided that instead of going to the grocery store on my own over the weekend I would wait until Monday after school and take the kids. I am claiming temporary insanity. BUT really it sounded like a good idea at the time!

Little did I know that I would be ready to call it a day before we had even passed the cart area. Two carts, three kids and a month's worth of groceries - could I not sense disaster?

First there was the fighting over who was riding in Alex's cart and who was riding in my cart and then there was the distress because we visited the banana aisle and were seemingly going to bypass the apple aisle (holy bananas it's only bananas)! After the apples were bagged and riding next to the apple girl it was onto bakery, dairy and the cereal aisle - believe me by the time we reached cereal it was a free for all. We have strawberry pop tarts and cinnamon roll pop tarts and vanilla milkshake pop tarts and Peanut Butter Cap'n Cruch and Apple Jacks and Lucky Charms (okay fine, the Lucky Charms were my choice). Anyone up for breakfast?

Along the way we blocked traffic and created cart jams. We sang about macaroni and cheese and peanut butter. We danced with the Mrs. Butterworths syrup bottle and balanced the 2 lb pkg of hamburger on our heads all through the frozen foods aisle (oh and by "we" I mean my children - I just pretended I had no idea who they were or what kind of mother they could possibly have :-))

I was so busy keeping track of my hamburger I wasn't even aware that I would be purchasing two packages of rocket pops, five pizzas and a jumbo package of Blue Bunny double decker fudge bars. I kid you not, when we got to the checkout with our two overloaded carts the lady actually said "well I'd ask you if you found everything but it's pretty obvious you have" - seriously! But I'd rather do it a month at a time and take 2 hours than to spend an hour EVERY WEEK at the grocery store. Life is too short to decide if you want paper or plastic more than once every four weeks.

Have a great week and don't expect to run into me at HyVee for at least another month - now Target, that's a different story...

P.S. Thank you all for your kind notes and thoughts about our dear Callie. She really was a wonderful dog. The kids have been taking it okay. They have decided since they did not get to tell her goodbye that they will bury her favorite tennis ball so that they can send it to heaven for her to play with. It makes me cry just thinking about how earnestly they want to do this. They may be spoiled rotten and not the kind of kids you want to take to the grocery store on a regular basis but my kids are kind - they are really truly kind and for that I couldn't be more grateful.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Callie is a puppy we have found...

She’s the best puppy in the town
She’ll come when you call ‘er
She’ll get down when you hollar
Callie’s the best puppy in the town.

Our sweet docile Callie died this morning. She was a Sheltie and had just turned seven. Late this Spring we learned that she was suffering from an enlarged heart and despite medication she did not get better. She was a fabulous dog. She would stay in the yard without being fenced in or on a leash, she wasn’t a big barker, she loved us and was loyal and true and a loving friend to all of us. She wasn’t the bravest dog on the block but that was part of her charm. She will be greatly missed by our family.

And yes, that really is a little tune we made up about her long ago (sung to the tune of She’ll be Comin’ Round the Mountain). We have a song for our cat Daisy too (hey what can I say – my brother and his kids made up songs for their pets also – I guess it is a genetic thing) but I’ll save that for another day since today is for Callie. I miss you sweet pup.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Once upon a time...

in a small Midwestern town a group of 20 children began school together in a one room school house. Okay fine, it wasn't a one room school house - it was a large two story brick building with a classroom for every grade and a boys entrance engraved in stone above one doorway which I never understood because the boys never used that entrance exclusively - we had equal opportunity doorways.

Anyway, sometime in the 70's this group of children began their school journey together as the "catholic school kids" (seriously, that is how we were referred to and are still referred to in mixed company - you know by the public school kids). We were 12 girls and 8 boys and for eight years those numbers nary wavered. We were a close group. Of course the numbers were uneven and even more so for me since of those 8 boys TWO of them were my cousins - the cutest boys (shout-out to Bryan and Tom) in the class and we were related. Where is the fairness in that? Let's just say I was very thankful for Jr. High when we were allowed to socialize with the public school kids and attend their Jr. high dances (finally we were star-bellied sneetches :-))

Recently one of the members of this class (no it was not me) decided that it would be a good thing to have a St. Joe's Class of 19__ Class Reunion. Phone calls were made (and inadvertently ignored by me). Invitations were sent (and inadvertently ignored by me). But no emails were sent. Let me give you a hint - if you really want to get in touch with me send an email. There is no telling what might happen to phone messages or mail in my house - I've got kids. Anyway, this lack of inadvertently ignoring on my behalf resulted in people actually searching for ME! Me who is really pretty findable. I'm thinking their investigative skills were not the greatest :-) Anyway they had to go through Roxann which is laughable because Roxann is a little bit more elusive than I am (I mean seriously, the girl DOES NOT even have an email account) and yet I am the one they couldn't locate. It still makes me laugh. SOOO Rox got the message and was very quick to call me (she has my cell phone number - that is the other sure way to contact me) and inform me that I needed to start responding to these people and that I might as well clear my calendar for the 20th because not only are we attending the reunion but we will be spending the night at her parent's house just like we would have done all those years ago. I guess she is thinking we need to relive the entire experience. So on the 20th I will be packing a small bag and heading to my hometown with Rox. I'm starting to get excited about the whole thing. Maybe we'll go tour the school. The last time I was there it still smelled the same - the whole school, it had it's own smell, especially the lunch room. I have so many memories of the years spent in that school (being sent home because my skirt was too short, square dancing in gym class, the Pilgrims and Indians annual Thanksgiving basketball game when I was a cheerleader, singing "Brandy you're a fine girl" with our girl group to the Mother Superior because her dog was named Brandy. OMG it is making me laugh). I'm thinking this could be a lot of fun.

Oh and upon graduation from 8th grade we moved to the Public High School (no private HS in our little town) and mixed and mingled with the real movers and shakers of the world - the public school kids. Believe me after the lectures from the nuns we were very surprised to learn that they weren't all on drugs or pregnant :-) And THAT graduating class - it was a little over 100 students and 20 of us - we were the CATHOLIC SCHOOL KIDS :-)

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

And there it was...

on my calendar - September 11th. I was planning the agenda for a Thursday meeting that I have every other week and as I looked at the calendar to verify the date it stopped me in my tracks. Tomorrow. September 11th. It made me sad (Holy Bananas, it seems like a lot of things are making me sad lately, maybe it's time to start some meds :-)).

I've been so preoccupied with my own life lately that the date totally snuck up on me. Can any of us ever think of September 11th as just another day again? I mean really I've never had a universally catastrophic date in my life before and it's weird. The date won't mean much to my kids just like the day Kennedy was shot doesn't mean much to me (not that I don't think it is a significant date it is just that I didn't experience it so it doesn't strike my soul - you know?) but September 11th will never be just another day for me although I wish it were. I always feel like there is something more I should be doing. Something more significant than just living my superficial life in my safe little cocoon. Maybe just appreciating that life and all it means is enough - I don't know. If you have an answer tell me because the answers I come up with - they just don't seem to be enough...

Monday, September 8, 2008

I want what I want...

and then I don’t. It is a terrible flaw. I think I want something. I dream about having it. Plan what I will do once I have it. And then I get it and it loses some of its appeal. I start second-guessing my decision and need to have it (I’m talking about big things here – like new furniture - new cars – new jobs - you know stuff like that). Sure I end up making peace with it all but there is that limbo period where I just don’t know if I really want what I want at all. My life – it’s so complicated :-)

Sometimes, when I’m lucky and the rose colored glasses are safely in the drawer, I actually realize that I don’t want what I think I want before I have a chance to not want it. For instance there is this house that I thought I wanted. I heard that it might be for sale. I waited and waited for it to go on the market and then the other day I was looking at real estate (hey, it’s a hobby) and there it was – THE HOUSE - on the market. I looked at the house, studied all the on-line pictures and then in less than five minutes I realized I don’t want this house at all. It really isn’t my style, it’s choppy, and fussy, and old-fashioned and OVER-PRICED. Actually part of the problem with the house – it isn’t what it used to be when I first noticed the house. It used to be on a bigger piece of land (which has since been divided and developed) and it was painted all white so it looked like a wedding cake (‘cuz really I’m a romantic for anything wedding related). But now there are new houses encroaching on its borders and it is wearing a paint job that may be appealing to some but is wayyyy to fussy for me. So the house today - not so much – I feel like the house has become a pretentious replica of itself. It has lost its simple elegance. So the house - I just don't want it anymore. Believe me when I say the HOTY is very relieved to hear that the house has officially been taken off my list of wants but there are others and they are still contenders :-)


Friday, September 5, 2008

I was soooo close…

To a clean getaway. I had a dentist appointment yesterday – just a cleaning - but between the noise of someone getting their teeth drilled and the smell it might as well have been a root canal – the anxiety was the same. Regardless, off I went in the pursuit of bright shiny chompers (sure I had cancelled six times before I actually showed up and my six month cleaning turned into a year cleaning but hey it’s all about anticipation and besides I have naturally clean teeth - seriously).

Once in the chair I was fine and the hygienist chick did her thing and then Ms. Dentist came in and we had the little chit-chat catch-up (mostly about kids and how I want the teeth cleaning/manicure option. They don’t offer it yet but I keep trying. I’d even bring my own polish). Anyway after all the formalities were taken care of she looked at my teeth, praising and poking and was just getting ready to call it a day when something caught her eye “oh you have a little chip missing from a filling” (well that’s nice – but it is not hurting anything and I am NOT getting it fixed because a little chip means let’s replace this whole dang filling – um let’s not) “AND it’s sticky which means there must be a little decay” (oh goodie for me) “let’s get that fixed” (sure, I'm right on that). So I said “okay but you know I’m going to put it off for at least a couple of months because that is just the way I do it” she laughed but then said “November is the limit” (guess she knows me and my boundary issues – no boundaries given? That’s fine but I’m going to keep pushing until I find them or as long as I can get away with making my own boundaries). So I have an appointment in November – I may end up cancelling, I’d hate to disappoint the appointment lady, whom I know personally and she has come to expect certain things from me – like at least one cancellation before I walk in the door. I’ve got a couple months to think about it and decide :-)

So, I almost made it – I almost made it out the door with all my current teeth and fillings in tact and little money out of my pocket – so so so close – yet so far away!

That’s it - I’m off, I’ve got a new toothbrush and mint flavored dental floss - life is good…

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Two Down Two To Go...

and the first week of school will be all but a memory. So far everyone is adjusting well. Lauren has had a few tears and was absolutely glued to me yesterday after we got home but tonight she was better. Alex is adjusting well - same school, same para, same room - consistency is good :-)

Tonight at dinner we had chicken - which prompted a big conversation about chicken and how chickens make chicken and whether chickens liked being eaten and why do the eggs we eat not have baby chicks growing inside of them. Have I mentioned my childrens' propensity for asking questions? I don't know where they get that :-) Anyway, Sydney decided that "pet" chickens didn't like being eaten but most people wouldn't pick a chicken for a pet because the chickens would leave eggs all over the house (you gotta love five year old logic). I can see these kind of conversations happening a lot. Bet you wish you were here :-)

That's it for today. I know I know it was a self-indulgent post about my kids but it was a tough day today - a day when I could have walked away from my job and never looked back - seriously - so I thought a little self-indulgence was okay.


Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Sometimes I drive him crazy…

You know the HotY is a very patient man but I’ll admit I do know how to push his buttons. BUT, isn’t that part of what marriage is all about – knowing the buttons and deciding whether to push them or not? Don’t act like you don’t know what I'm talking about or like I’m a bad person – you know it’s true. We know the buttons and sometimes we choose to push them.

One of the HotY’s buttons is when I don’t tell him about decisions I’ve made until I’ve already taken action. It really isn’t a conscious thing – a lot of the time I have thought about things for quite awhile before doing something and I just expect that he knows what I’m going to do before I do it. But SURPRISE to me – he CAN’T read my mind and these decisions I make do take him unaware. For example, yesterday I mentioned that I almost bought a new car while he and the kids were away that weekend. It isn’t like I had mentioned a new car before or even talked about test driving a car but a week after the event I just popped it out because, well I guess I felt like pushing a button - and his reply “well at least it wasn’t a house”. No buttons pushed and his statement was valid because our very first house – I bought it without him (I went and looked at the house, liked the house, made an offer on the house). I called him at work and said “I bought a house” – just like that I threw it out there. To say he was surprised was an understatement but after he saw the house he agreed my decision had been a good one - but still - he would have liked to have been part of the process. Sometimes I can be very independent even in a partnership. I’m thinking this might not be the best option :-(

So although I thought the car thing might catch him off guard it didn’t - nothing had actually been purchased and now he knew I was thinking – new car - but still, I persevered and managed to push a button over the weekend (again - don't judge - you know you've done it too). About a week ago I decided we needed to have a little friend/neighbor get together – we haven’t entertained adults in a while so I planned a party. I emailed the invitees some time last week and have been receiving acceptances and then on Sunday I thought – “hmmm maybe I better tell the HotY about this before someone else mentions it to him first”. So I told him – yesterday – that we would be entertaining on the 26th (I’m giving him plenty of notice – he should be happy) and that pushed the button – a little. Again, he was okay with the decision but would have liked to have been in on the decision making process – although seriously, after sixteen years you think the man would realize that I might not change and he could at least TRY to read my mind - it's the least he could do - seriously! :-)

Have a great button-less day!